“What morbid power is asking you deeper into the guts of the caves?” asks the Steam page for The Cave Diver. It ain’t calling me, developer Ovsko. I learn the opening phrases of your description and instantly began working away from my laptop computer. I am nonetheless working, in truth. This text is being breathlessly dictated to Oisin over the telephone. I am someplace within the neighborhood of Luton, now, and hope to make all of it the best way to Scotland by the weekend.
After that, there will be the issue of securing naval journey as I proceed my headlong flight. Then I will have to fret about frostbite as I gallop previous the North Pole and start my lengthy traversal of the Pacific. In some unspecified time in the future I’ll attain New Zealand, which – in response to this helpful antipodal mapping site – is roughly as distant from The Cave Diver Steam web page at the moment loaded on my laptop computer as I can get with out venturing into outer house. I don’t rule out venturing into outer house, which is notable for its full and categorical deficit of caves.
Maybe you suppose I am being hysterical. Good friend, The Cave Diver is about perishing repeatedly in crawlspaces just a few inches extensive, deep beneath the floor. It is a recreation based mostly on that awful cutaway image you’ve got probably seen and flinched away from on social media. And in addition, beloved lunchbreak physics diversion QWOP. What sort of vile mind turns QWOP into… this? I assume there’s nothing for it however to roll the trailer.
The premise right here is that you just’re looking for a possibly-mythical subterranean flower that has the power to treatment your paraplegia. You progress utilizing your palms and arms and, the place referred to as for, the factor of momentum. You too can scrawl indicators on the rock to navigate by throughout your subsequent try, within the fairly doubtless occasion that you just die. The specter of being crushed or trapped apart, the depths harbour some sort of historical, ravenous evil. Going by the brand artwork, The Oesophagus Diver would have been an appropriate various title.
It is out later this yr. Hopefully, I will have reached New Zealand by then and reinvented myself as a travelling hairdryer salesman who nonetheless goals of being an astronaut. It would not be the primary time. When you have a grotesque fascination with caves – which to be sincere, I form of do, so long as I can get up in them – you may additionally get pleasure from free 20-minute spookelunker Crawl.
