Professional tip: for those who ship RPS an e mail of your recreation with the hook “I do know you want goofy stuff…” then, sure, there is a first rate probability I will take the bait, mirth-parched wanderer within the infinite dessert left by a goofphagic modernity as I’m. Titanic Re-Christened: Maiden Vengeance is sort of unplayable in my browser – it can not seem to resolve whether or not I am clicking on the sport on the itch.io web page itself – however I am writing about it anyway as a result of it made my morning espresso a few delicate chuckles higher than it will have been in any other case.
You play a strapped, bipedal Titanic out to get revenge on the icebergs that sunk it, with a big collection of weapons, together with a sniper rifle named ‘Molly’s Greetings’ and an Uzi named ‘The White Star Particular’. If you kill sunglass-wearing iceberg minions, the Titanic will spout one-liners like “I am again and stuffed with steam” and “your assault on me was glacially motivated”. It’s terrible and I imagine the world is a greater place for its existence.
This is the lore:
The Titanic has sat immobile on the Atlantic Ocean ground for over 100 years…till now.
A cursed wine bottle dropped within the ocean by a ship passing overhead sinks to the depths and smashes open in opposition to the skeletal hull of the ghost ship, re-christening it, and bringing it again to life. Gaining sentience for the primary time, the Titanic realizes it has an insatiable thirst for one factor: revenge.
Information the unsinkable ship by means of the iceberg stronghold and collect the 4 smokestacks with the intention to summon your outdated nemesis, the iceberg that put you 12,500 ft deep within the freezing ocean in April 1912.
You possibly can, ostensibly, play it at no cost in your browser via itch.io here. Me? I have been doing this so lengthy I not should play video games to know in the event that they’re good or not. This one is not, by the best way, however it’s artwork. Really, it is probably not that both. However it’s silly. And there’s no higher encapsulation of man’s everlasting hubris than that.
